Today, I sat down to figure out what I want from life right now. I wrote the following list: A job, A great body, To start seeing a personal trainer, To start working towards becoming a personal trainer, Friends, Happy husband. (My husband isn’t depressed or anything, but there are certain things he’d like to see me being more on top of, and those are things I ought to do anyway). Then I wrote out how to go about getting those things. There’s not much to say about wanting a job, I need one and I don’t have one, therefore I want one. As for a great body, that’s what this whole blog is about, so I’ll give it a wee rest this post.

What I want to talk about now is wanting friends. It’s not that I don’t have any, it’s just that I get too shy to call them up to hang out. I get shy because I’m heavy, and because I don’t feel I can do what skinny people do for fun and friendship. Two of the girls I want to hang out with post lots of pictures of themselves doing acro-yoga together. Friggin acro-yoga, people. There’s no place for me in that! And I doubt I could keep up with them on their hikes. What else do people do? Eat together…. haha, terrible idea. Shopping? Hells no. Dancing or clubbing or drinking? I don’t like any of those things. Then there’s just sitting around and chatting… but what can I chat about? I don’t really do anything worth talking about. I’m good at listening though, I guess, so maybe that could work.

A while ago, I posted on facebook and invitation to anyone who was interested to go to the gym with me for free as my guest basically any time any day. One person responded, but he immediately got very sick and has been busy since.

Today, after seeing “friends” on the list of things I want, I was inspired to text him back and see if he has time now. We’ve decided to go next thursday.

Another plan I had for feeling like I have friends, is to stay very active on here and really try to cultivate relationships with people who are blogging on similar topics to mine. You may have noticed me commenting on your posts. That is me wanting to befriend you. This is me openly asking if anyone else out there is lonely for someone who will understand what this is like, and this is me announcing that on facebook I am Katrina Huber-Juma, and I would love to chat. I’m ok if you message me only when you are trying to stop yourself from bingeing. I would be happy to be your anti-binge friend. I’ll even give you my number so you can call or text. I would like to be someone’s supportive friend. For now, at least, I have little else to do, so I’m likely to respond quickly to a text or message.

If you looked at the image and were able to read my handwriting, you may have noticed I made a list of ways to court you lovely ladies of the blogosphere. One thing I’m hopeful about is the Blogger Care Package Swap  community building scheme by Alison.

Also, today, Brittany, Aubrie and I entered into a “pact” to do better with our food choices. Brittany and Aubrie, I have no idea how seriously you took the pact idea, but I am hereby offering to listen to any stories of struggle or accomplishment that you think are too mundane to keep in your blog. If you need to list your foods and know that someone is looking, I will look. If you need to bemoan the missed opportunity to eat a cupcake, I will listen. You can tell me on facebook message, text, phone call, comment on an unrelated blog post of mine,  we can make a facebook group, or I can link to you at the end of each of my blog posts and ask you how you have been doing. I sincerely want to be helpful. So let me know if I can in any way help hold you accountable!

If anyone else wants in on the pact, let me know. I’m very interested in everyone’s wellbeing. I want to be friendly, and I have plenty of time.

Hopefully I didn’t come off as too clingy in this post.


13 thoughts on “Friends?

  1. I was uber serious! I too will be the supportive friend. For me personally, I have a best friend I can talk to any time I need, but it’s in a way not the same because she’s thin and doesn’t have to worry about losing weight. I’ve been really wanting someone I can personally relate to, so I’m soooo glad I found you gals!

    Lately I’ve been in your same shoes regarding friends. As I was reading this, I tried to think of things to do and really all that came to mind was sitting around chatting, watching movies, drinking, or playing cards. Lol. Well that’s gonna get boring after a while! My advice about your 2 friends who do yoga – if you want to hangout but don’t feel comfortable doing the yoga (never actually heard of that yoga… I’ll have to look it up!) maybe ask them if they have other ideas you could do. I’m sure they would think of something all 3 of you could do that wouldn’t make you feel uncomfortable. That’s what I would do if I was in your situation 🙂

    Oh and I will look you up on the good ol social media and send you a request! For some reason it’s not coming up on my phone right now. Ugh technology! 😛


      1. Yep, I call em skinny minis too! 🙂 I just watched a YouTube video on that… I don’t think that looks fun at all! Even if I was skinny!


  2. I love love love that you are writing out your goals AND ways to get them. I am in the same boat as you regarding friends. Had a ton in HS, but afterwards became a social hermit. Now that I’m in my nursing program I am talking to more people, but I’m still too self-aware to act naturally around them. I rely heavily on my virtual communities to feel like a normal, social human being rofl. I don’t mind that so much because the friendships I make here are so rewarding and special to me. I added you on Facebook just now 🙂

    and really…who the hell does acro-yoga?


    1. Yeah, I was doing well friend-wise in high school, and the acro-yoga girls that I want to reconnect with were sort of my friends then…my closest friends, the ones I would still feel comfortable with–even at my current weight, have mostly scattered.

      I’m so glad that blogging exists. I already can’t fathom how I got by without this community!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I love that you are writing your goals and making a plan to achieve them! That is an important step. Maybe you can ask people if they would like to paint pottery with you or go to a show or the movies. I know what you mean by the yoga thing. I was invited by an acquaintance to take a Barre class (she is very fit and I’m still working on my fitness) I was scared I wouldn’t be able to keep up but I tried my best and stopped when I needed too! You sound like a cool person!

    Liked by 1 person

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